I have been eliminating people in my life who cause me harm...even when they don't mean to be causing me harm...
Not physical harm, but at some points physical harm has occurred.
I know that I love these people and I know that they love me, but...
Yeah...
And it hasn't been deliberate. It has been subconscious. Reacting to things that I wouldn't react to before. Reacting in a way that was totally overblown to the perceived sin/slight.
Maybe, because I have always been capable of forgiveness, this is me telling myself that I need to go on some sort of vision quest and leave the world behind...
It is all on me, and after a lot of self reflection, I know that is what is happening...and I hate myself for it...
Because it isn't what I want....I want these people in my life but...on my terms, which is unfair...and I don't know what to do...or how to apologize and be honest...
So...there is that.
I probably just need a beer.
do tell... were you ever able to speak with your friends?
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