Geek Notes (Or things that tick me off)

1. "That's not what the guy at Best Buy said."

2. "The older version of this software was so much better."

3. "Why can't you do it for free?"

4. "That doesn't seem so hard."

5. "If you can do this, you should probably be doing X, Y, Z."

Inspired by real life and this list.

1. "That's not what the guy at Best Buy said."

This is my personal favorite. It does not have to be limited to Best Buy either. It can be any big box store where the staff seems friendly, knowledgeable, and has been trained in the art of the up-sell. This is usually said to me when I am elbow deep in fixing an issue and the person who issues this statement is feeling put off because I am either ignoring them entirely or answering with monosyllabic grunts and they feel like stating this as a way of establishing a dialogue or it has something to do with primate dominance. Either works.

I do not know what the training regime at Best But is. For all I know they could require advanced degrees in info tech/science from the local polytechnic or state university as a condition of employment. They could be correct.

The funny thing about this statement is that Best Buy sells services as well. You could call them up, have them come out and everything would be fine. Or it would not be...but they would be charging you.

2. "The older version of this software was so much better."

I recently helped someone upgrade their office suite from a version that was released in the early Aughts to something that was much more recent. There were functional reasons for this upgrade, including the older product reaching the declared end of life, but mostly it was because the newer version was much better about auto-saving documents and I did not have to worry about 11 pm phone calls about saving this important letter.

I finishing installing the software, patching it, and I am about to start another task, when I hear someone complaining that this software cannot do what the old software did. Actually, in most software releases they do not decrease functionality.

"Are you looking in the right place?"

"Oh, there it is."

Then there is the requisite conversation about the pace of change and how UI designers should "just leave well enough alone" as if there was not testing to determine that the new UI would offer ease of use as well as greater functionality (you can have both) for the end users. Nope, it was just some guy in Redmond or Mountain View that decided that he wanted to screw with millions of people.

3. "Why can't you do it for free?"

True story. Talking to someone who is at their office and their large multi-function printer has gone offline. It is not doing anything. This is a problem because it is a paper driven office. This person calls me and asks if I can do anything. I cannot, but I say that I could call some people who may be able to do something and I mention that they will have to be paid.

"Why can't you do it for free?" and then it became a thing about people being greedy.

Sadly, this has happened more than once.

When all you have is information, that information takes on a value. Information and the ability to apply said information is a commodity and it should be treated as such.

4. "That doesn't seem so hard."

*shakes head*

No, it isn't. I was able to teach myself most of what I know about how desktops work in less than a week. It took a little bit longer for other things, but desktops...especially with consumer grade software...just a week.

It wasn't that hard to figure out how things are supposed to work when they are working well. When things are broken, however, I do not know what to say. It still takes me research to understand why your trip to "Large & Lovely Italian American Princesses" caused several pernicious viruses to install themselves on your machine.

It is going to be a lot of hurry up and wait for me.

And here is the thing...if you took some time to educate yourself about this tool, this tool that you use often, you would understand that it is more difficult than you are giving credit for OR you would not get into this mess in the first place.

5. "If you can do this, you should probably be doing X, Y, Z."

This one may be related to my family. Every member of my family has their own set of skills that they excel with, just like your family, and just like your family, not everyone is comfortable or conversant with and in technology. And as most of you know, tech is a very broad field with a lot of very specialized things going on, and while some of the skills are transferable, not all of them are.

"Oh, you cook French food. You know, I have a friend who is working at McDonald's. Maybe you two can collaborate."

It becomes frustrating because it shows that after I mention something technical about my life, you are just tuning it out. I take pride in the things that I do, and I try to do them very well.