Duck & Cover Redux

Or...Fallout Too (yeah, that's not a great geek joke but it was the first thing I thought of. For those of you who have no clue what I am talking about with this aside, go here.)

For the last seven years of the Bush Administration, every couple of months, we were told that we need to be on the watch for terrorists because a credible threat had been made (and some of these threats were probably credible and it is a credit to our security apparatus that these threats were exposed and nipped in the bud but some of them were pandering in order to shift focus from other domestic issues) and we should be afraid. Very afraid.

But now...

As the Obama administration is in the doldrums, beware of THE NUCLEAR HOLOCAUST!

My parents have told me stories of the duck and cover drills that they engaged in when they were school children and the fear that it inspired in them. My mother went to parochial school and was told that she would only have the time to say "Thank you, Jesus" because a full prayer was far too long to complete.

Now...in addition to the continuing economic collapse, the threat of the nuclear end times is being presented as a VERY POSSIBLE REALITY.

From the New York Times:

In June, the administration released to emergency officials around the nation an unclassified planning guide(PDF) 130 pages long on how to respond to a nuclear attack. It stressed citizen education, before any attack.

Without that knowledge, the guide added, “people will be more likely to follow the natural instinct to run from danger, potentially exposing themselves to fatal doses of radiation.”

Specialists outside of Washington are divided on the initiative. One group says the administration is overreacting to an atomic threat that is all but nonexistent.

Then there is this from the aforementioned guide:

There will be no significant Federal response at the scene for 24 hours and the
full extent of Federal assets will not be available for several days. Emergency
response is principally a local function. Federal assistance will be mobilized as
rapidly as possible; however, for purposes of this document, no significant Federal
response is assumed for 24 – 72 hours.


So, not only should we be terrified by the threat of nuclear attack (which many reasoned people insist will not happen) but we should understand that the Federal Government will not help us, which may be a lesson learned from the mistakes of "Rainstorm Katrina".

So, let me make this suggestion to you for your holiday season. As the drinks and canapés are being passed at your holiday parties, turn to the person to the left of you and ask, "When the inevitable nuclear attack happens, where are you going to go?" and then follow-up with "In a post nuclear attack world, would you prefer to be a member of a cannibalistic rape gang or a mindless zombie of the wasteland?"

I am sure that it will make you the life of the party, and that is exactly what Obama wants for you.

Via NYT